flashback friday, twins part II

Read the story from the beginning, here.

The pregnancy started out different from the start. I immediately felt some mild nausea, which I didn't have with Peter (maybe it's a girl, I thought!). You may be shocked to hear that it was very mild. I did not throw up, even once (and this is where I apologize to those of you who throw up for 3 months straight, for my strange ability to not get sick when I'm pregnant, even with twins. I'm sorry!). I also felt EXTREME hunger cravings (just for food in general), but had the same symptom with Pete and thought nothing of it.

A few weeks into the pregnancy, I had some cramping and spotting and was sure that I was miscarrying. I went to the doctor for some tests and they said there were no signs of miscarriage, but that I should let them know if my symptoms increased. I had read about miscarriage before. I ran through the whole thing in my head. I knew that if a baby miscarries, it is usually implanted in the uterine wall incorrectly or there is some other physical problem with the egg or placenta and that it never would have been a baby. This helped me distance my thoughts from the idea of losing a "baby." I would only be losing an egg that was physically incapable of becoming a baby. That made it a little bit better in my mind. When I made it to 9 weeks with no other signs of miscarriage, I was still a little anxious at our first doctor's appointment. I prepared myself for the worst.

We arrived at the doctor's office to find out that they would do an ultrasound right there in the exam room. I was pretty excited considering that most people don't have an ultrasound until about 18 weeks or so (as we did with Pete). The office had a portable ultrasound machine and I was looking forward to seeing the little blob that would be our baby. Wade and I were waiting in the exam room when our doctor came in. We met her for the first time and she asked us the usual first appointment questions about our family medical history, personal medical history, past pregnancies, etc. I remember one of those usual questions was, "Any family history of multiples?" 'No', of course was my answer, and we moved on quickly to the next questions. "Well, lets take a look at the baby," she said happily.

She started moving the ultrasound hand-held probe over my belly, pushing just a little too hard for comfort. It was silent as she searched for signs of the uterus and placenta. "There's the baby," she said, still moving the probe around. Silence. She kept moving around, looking for what I assumed was just more info about how things looked in there. I was annoyed that she wouldn't just hold still so I could see my baby. More silence. Maybe 30 seconds had passed and she finally spoke again, "Well, you know how I asked about your family history of multiples?" Uh, yeah, I remembered, it was like two minutes ago and why are you bringing that up? I thought.
"Yeah," I answered.
"Well, there are two babies in there," she stated with a giggle in her voice.

My immediate reaction was shock. I turned red, I smiled uncontrollably, then tried to fight back tears. I wasn't sad, but I wasn't happy, I was just shocked. This had taken me by complete surprise. I didn't even have the slightest inkling. Wade was standing at the foot of the bed the whole time. He later told me that he figured it out when she kept looking around for things and he saw two heads. I was completely clueless until she actually said the words.

After the initial shock, I started to feel a little betrayed. I was hoping for a uneventful pregnancy, and this was anything but uneventful. My emotions jumped around quickly from anxious, nervous, unsure, amazed, excited, overjoyed, and sad. I had so many questions and no idea what a pregnancy with two babies would mean for us. I thought first about the complications. The first thing our doctor said when we found two babies was that the risk of complications is always higher for everything when there are two (well, that's comforting, since I didn't have any complications the first time around!). She assured us that we would be monitored more closely and that they would keep a close eye on the babies. That would mean frequent ultrasounds, NST's, and possibly bed rest. I left that day with more questions than answers. I'll admit that I couldn't wait to get on the internet and read everything I could find about twins.

We left the exam room in a daze. I remember standing at the front desk to make an appointment for our next visit. The receptionist was the first person I spoke to about it (other than Wade and the doctor). "We just found out we're having twins," I said to her as I tried to remember what the doctor told me about when to make the next appointment. I was trying to stay calm, but I was unable to think clearly. Did she say to come back in two weeks? When am I supposed to make an appointment for an ultrasound again? Wade and I left the office in the same daze and drove straight to my step-sister Nancy's place, where we had left Pete. She met us at the entrance to her apartment building.

Knowing I was worried about miscarriage, she asked, "How did it go? Did you hear the heartbeat?"
"Yeah, everything was fine. We heard both heartbeats." I said.
"What? Both? Twins?! NO WAY!" I don't think she believed it. Heck, I didn't believe it. I did see two babies on the ultrasound. I knew it was true, but it still hadn't sunk in. It would be months before it actually sunk in.

To be concluded...
(Sorry, I can't get it all written in one sitting! I will finish next week, I promise!)

flashback friday, twins part III